Saturday, May 5, 2007

Old mother hubbard....B is not in the cupboard

B is going to stay in hotel room with her friends as they are getting together for girl's night out. They are celebrating the life of a friend who is having a double mastectomy this month. Her friend wanted to cut loose and they are going here.

This will be the second time she has attempted to spend the night away from her kids since JCG was born more than 4 years ago.

The first time was a complete disaster. JHGIII was not two years old yet, he was still breast feeding and had never been without his mommy. As soon as B left he was waiting by the front door waiting for her to come home. He cried and cried. I was devastated. I couldn't do anything to get him to stop crying.

You see to make this situation worse, B was staying in a hotel just outside of Cleveland and was not driving her own car. Thus she was stuck.

This did not cross my mind at the time. All I could think was trying to come up with something to get him to forget about mommy. So I broke down and called B. This only made the situation worse. Mainly because it just made her feel terrible. I probably didn't help the situation by some of the things I said out of desperation and frustration.

I vow to make this time better. The kids are older. JHGIII is done breast feeding. My 21 year old niece is here. I will not call B unless one of the kids gets hurt.

I am always aware of how lucky I am to have B in my life. She is very good to me and is a great mother for my children. But I especially think about her when she is not around for an extended amount of time. Her eyes, her smile, her soul and her heart all warm this house like a constant burning flame. Her absence makes a noticeable difference in the over all mood of the house. We are not a whole unit without her.

Hurry home B. We love and miss you!

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